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In 2013, an online petition asking OKCupid to accommodate trans and genderqueer people received more than 1,000 signatures.

Ryley Pogensky, the genderqueer person who created the petition, said that when he asked OKCupid about adding more gender identity options, a representative told him it would be difficult to change the site because it was built “in a pretty binary way.” La Mon has noticed that his male and female OKCupid profiles get different matches.

' When it came to us actually getting together, she had no idea what to expect in terms of my body,' Oli says.

' She knew I was on testosterone, but I avoided going into detail by never wearing less than a T-shirt and boxers around her, and just focusing on her sexually.' For Laura, sex with Oli was a revelation.

She and the guy hadn't had much communication, and she assumed he was mostly interested in hooking up. ” This doesn't happen often, Colleen said, but when it does she tries to play it cool.

La Mon prefers to be out about his gender with potential dates.

He thinks people will figure it out anyway when they meet him.

In both profiles he makes it clear that he is “a trans guy” and that people should “only message me if you’re cool with that.” Part of the need for this complicated negotiation is that OKCupid doesn’t allow users to identify as “transgender”—just “male” or “female.” The site has been in the news this week after cofounder Christian Rudder announced that developers secretly changed some people's compatibility ratings and removed profile photos to learn more about behavior on the site.

While some have criticized OKCupid for showing people false or manipulated content as an experiment, the site's failure to accommodate transgender users may be a larger and more long-standing ethical dilemma.

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